Hands up!

Who here loves Elsa?

On the outside, proud and regal. Inside, beset by fear and hounded by a dark secret. You know, Elsa, the fragile protagonist (or is it antagonist?) in "Frozen". It's only made $1.5 billion so far.

Psychologists and armchair commentators say it's because for the first time Disney gave us a princess we could relate to. Flawed, fearful, hopeful, hanging on to something, struggling to allow the love in. Kids and adults flocked to it. And, yes, even the guys.

Just try and get the song out of your head now, eh?

Like it or not, it's a good thing to be talking about letting go. It's why this movie ran over the box office and back again.

But let's not be trite about it. I'll say right now that "letting go" is the frank, stark opposite of what you get told MOST of the time in most situations. And that's a serious problem.

Isn't it?

Grab Hold!

Get a Grip!

Take the Bull by the Horns!

Keep your Hand on the Wheel!

Put your Foot on the Gas!

Plan your Work, and Work your Plan!

Name it and Claim it!

Take Control!

Be in Command!

Tired yet?

(Big sigh.)

I know this kind of thinking is exhausting. The expectations quickly become relentless.

It's not that letting go is difficult for us. It's that we have habitually heard – and therefore habitually practice – hanging on to things. Tightly. To the death.

And habits are what can own us.

(Deep breath.)

Doesn't have to be this way.

Seriously. Do you believe that? I do because I witness it all the time. People actually learn to let go and are so much better for it.

I can also assure you that running from things is not the same as letting go. Neither is mild avoidance or whistling past the difficult stuff that causes us stress, clogs up our minds, breaks down our physical health or strains our relationships.

We have to be in it. That's where we start.

Scary? Understood. But with some practice we can stop being frightened or feeling ugly about the difficulties that dog us. We can see and live through them into something better, fuller.

Warning signs are a gift to us.

If we nurture awareness of what is actually going on in us (TING!!) we are on the pathway to discovering a happier, more balanced and fulfilling life.

And our bodies agree.

Our bodies are telling us all day and all night what's going on. Our thought patterns, if we can learn to observe them, are telling us what's got a hold on us, or what we won't let go of.

Have you ever had this happen?

You replay, and replay, and replay events and experiences over, and over, and over. Sometimes these events haven't even happened yet. And you make them up on the go. And then you replay, and replay, and replay them.

I know! We long to be rid of them!

This is a sign that you're holding on to something. And you really do need to let it go.

There are healthy ways to accomplish this. I don't mean "accomplish" as in you've arrived and there's a tidy bow on it. I mean to really FEEL great, at ease, released, relieved – no matter what's going on around you.

And I would love for you to experience more of this.

Love Betty